18: London Bound
by Julie Verne
Summary: Set directly after Season 5, Episode 12


London Bound

They had a long time at the airport to talk, and Alex dropped off Maggie's luggage, holding her best friend as long as she could. They boarded the plane, and Maggie took the window seat, less used to international flights. After takeoff, Sydney pulled up the armrest between them, rested her head on Maggie's chest, curled her feet under her.

"If you hadn't come, I wouldn't have gone." Sydney said when she thought Maggie was asleep. Maggie sighed contentedly held Sydney closer. "I changed my mind dozens of times but in the airport I realised that I was doing it again.I was running away from you again. And I was so happy with you, so much happier than I ever thought I could be. I know it's my first real relationship, I know I haven't been with a lot of people - or anyone else, at all - but this is the most me I've ever been. I don't know why I thought I could walk away from that." Maggie stirred, looked down at Sydney.

"Because you're passionate, and that's one of the things I love about you. You have a passion for your career and while it hurt that you'd leave me behind for it, I wish I cared that much about anything that I'd give up everything for it."

"But you do. You just did. I thought I was asking too much, I didn't want to take your career from you - because I'd already said that no one would take it from me - but you wouldn't. I would have stayed for you. I was going to go back to the hospital, I was going to get a cab when I saw you. I couldn't leave like that. It felt terrible and I was telling myself I was doing it for you – because there is no way in hell I'd leave you behind for my sake – but to leave you behind willingly, to push you away… I left the note, but I couldn't say what I wanted to say in it, wasn't sure you'd find someone to read it. I love you Maggie, and I can't bear to be without you. If you'd wanted to stay, I would have come back. My career means a lot to me – but you have always meant more. When I was there last year, when I was in Tel Aviv, when I had the best jobs in the best hospitals…"

Sydney looked at Maggie, took her hand.

"When I said I thought about you every day, that was an understatement. You were always on my mind, and while I enjoyed the work, I was never really satisfied. I was always wondering, always thinking back, and objectively, we'd never even been on a date. We never really talked about it, we were together once… and yet when I went home I didn't think about the great things I'd done, or the babies I saved. I thought about you, and having done all those things meant nothing if I couldn't come home to tell you about them. England would have been the same all over again. Just… filling time until I could go home. Until I could see you again, and hope that you'd forgive me for walking away from you again. But.. are you sure you made the right choice? I never want to stand in your way, and that job… that was a really good job you gave up to start all over again in another country."

Maggie hesitated. The job she'd just walked away from was how Sydney got her start, was one of the stepping stones Sydney had used to get this position.

"It would have been nice," Maggie said slowly. "But it can wait. I can always stand to keep learning, and I think the experience will look almost as good on my resume. As for the wage… well… I hope you'll be supporting us for the most part, because the one I've been offered in England is minimal."

Sydney smiled against Maggie's collarbone. "Of course. And the bed is on me too. Double?"

"Queen," Maggie said, jostling Sydney.

"But I like being close to you when we sleep." Sydney pouted, and Maggie pressed a kiss to her temple.

"We're close now. We'll make it work in a queen." Sydney hummed contentedly, started to doze off.

"You're not an island," Maggie said suddenly.

"What?" Sydney asked, surprised.

"You're not alone. It's not just you against the world any more. You've got me, and I'm always on your side."

"I know. It takes some getting used to. I've always known how my family would react, so I always tried to be self-sufficient." Sydney said, knowing she'd been wrong, but knowing Maggie would understand.

"Next time you have a big decision, talk to me, ok?"

You know goodbyes aren't really my thing, so let's just… make them unnecessary from now on, OK?" Sydney nuzzled closer into Maggie, closed her eyes again.

* * *

Author's note: This is a pretty old chapter from my Dropbox. Not sure if there are any more.


End file.
